Early in our engagement, Emily and I often joked about eloping. We would poke fun at going to Vegas or we would imagine what it would be like to be off on some pacific island with water as clear as glass and the whitest sand ever seen. Wedding? This wasn’t for us, this was for everyone else. We already knew we loved each other.
In my college/early 20s, I’ve had that conversation with people who think that the wedding is an invention of the christian church. Or they think that it’s simply a western custom that’s perpetuated and not necessary. These people who say that being devoted to each other and not married is just as good.
I’m not here to say it isn’t. I wouldn’t make such a bold refutation. But I would have to disagree.
As many of you know, Em and I have been together for 7 years (pushing 8). I’ve joked that we’ve practically been married for quite a while now. It’s hard not to feel that way since we lived together (in some form or another) for some time. We do everything together and spend most of our waking moments together (if you don’t include work). We’ve taken many trips together, cooked many meals together and have had our fair share of fights and laughs.
But I realize, now, how wrong I was. This weekend wasn’t just for everyone else. This weekend was truly for us.
As cliche as it sounds, it really was worth it. It was more than worth it; it was the best day of my life (also cliche, but oh so true). I definitely have more grey hairs because of this process and it seemed grueling at times. Torture, some might say. And, in some ways, it was just planning a big party.
But when I found myself up there with Emily, and in the witness of people who mean the most to us on this Earth, in our lives, I could not help but feel that this was for us.
When you begin to date someone, there is no real public declaration, there are no promises, and few around you benefit from the light and joy. In time, this slowly changes. You’re expected to always be in the presence of your other half, and you expect things from each other and friend groups are brought together.
The wedding was special to me because it was the culmination of those experiences. In the presence of people who’ve touched our lives the most, we declared our devotions to each other. We grasped hands in the journey of marriage, promising never to let go or look back. We asked everyone to support us in this journey.
My last entry spoke of my respect for Michelle Obama. There are two new women I’d like to say that I have a new found respect for: Maureen Dowd and Gail Collins.
They are both op-ed columnists at New York Times. I’ve had a great time following their take on the Democratic nomination race. Their columns are often funny, insightful and on-point.
Gail Collin’s latest piece Hillary, Buckeye Girl speaks of the race going on in Ohio. Here’s a quote that I particularly enjoyed:
At the debate on Tuesday, Clinton followed through on her promise to hit Obama hard on campaign fliers that she said mischaracterized her positions on trade and health care. She had been billing this confrontation in terms usually reserved for professional wrestling grudge matches. But earlier that day, a right-wing radio commentator at a John McCain rally denounced Obama in terms so over the top that McCain felt obliged to apologize. After that, a sloppy quotation mark in a Nafta pamphlet sounded pretty petty.
This is in reference to Bill Cunningham (supposed well-known conservative radio personality) going on a rant about Barack HUSSSSEEEIIINNNNN Obama:
I don’t know if either of them are supporting Hillary or Barack in this race. I think they’ve deconstructed the politics quite well. Gail writes:
Back around Debate 10 — lo those many debates ago — Hillary routinely wiped the floor with Barack. He was reluctant and stumbling. She was confident and presidential. Then, as Adam Nagourney pointed out in The Times this week, he suddenly evolved. Now, he’s better than she is — calm and witty at crucial junctures, always to the point, never obsessing on the small stuff. After this week’s Debate 20, Hillary’s people gloated over the fact that Barack had said he agreed with her entirely on several key points, as if this was an admission of weakness rather than the key to his campaign — the promise to find whatever consensus there is and build on it.
Perhaps I’m a bit biased since their analysis typically shows Obama in a better light and Hillary in a not-so glamorous light. Would an unbiased person agree?
Anyway, what can I say but that I’m a new fan of both of them. Kudos!
Well-spoken, inspirational, frank, gutsy.. these are the words I would use to describe Michelle Obama, wife of Barack Obama.
Last week, she was attacked for a comment she made regarding being proud of America. Here is the exact quote with a few sentences of context:
But what we’ve learned over this is that hope is making a comeback. For the first time in my adult life I’m proud of my country.. and not just because barack has done well, but because I think people are hungry for change. And I have been desperate to see our country moving in that direction and just not feeling so alone in my frustration and disappointment. i’ve seen people who hungry to be unified around some basic common issue and it makes me proud. and i feel privileged to be a part of even witnessing this…
Most of the pundits have let go of this. Some acknowledge that it was a poor choice of words not conveying what she truly felt. Others simply make sarcastic, bitter remarks about things she should be proud of.
I think it’s quite clear, from the context, what she was saying. And I’m left wondering why some columnists out there are even bothering to reference this?
This Saturday I attended Andrew’s and Jennifer’s wedding. Some people have mixed feelings when it comes to weddings. While everyone is happy for the groom and bride, often there are ceremonies that last excruciatingly long. Sometimes weddings can be occasions full of stress. Personally, I have to say that I like weddings…really, really like weddings. I don’t think I’ve ever had a negative experience.
There may be some of you that may question my manhood. I can live with that. It’s not that I LOVE weddings because of all the flowers and pink and doilies and crying and all. While that is nice, that’s not what I mean when I say I like weddings.
The feeling I’m talking about is the same reason why I feel Hawaii is most relaxing place on Earth (that I have been to). Hawaii was the most relaxing place because EVERYONE is on vacation (minus the locals of course). Everyone drives a little slower, walks like that have no where to go and talks as if there are no worries. It’s the same thing with weddings. Everyone’s happy and everyone’s celebrating. It’s the epitome of a joyous occasion.
The one thing that I’m really a sucker for is the slideshow. Many people do slideshows and it’s certainly not a new thing. But it’s almost like the ultimate celebration of life. You put on some music that has personal meaning and scroll through moments of life captured by a camera. Each picture celebrates your life as a kid, as a toddler, as an awkward teen, as a college student and finally as an adult. With each picture, there are friends and family that make life what it is: something quite grand.
